For over a decade now I’ve talked about running my own nonprofit organization. In 1999 I left home for Auburn University to study business administration so I could one day pursue nonprofit work. A year and a half later, I was back living with my folks serving a semester of academic suspension from Auburn. I blew it. Now I was making coffee for over-privileged mall rats at Books-A-Million. When the opportunity to attend the University of Mobile arose, I jumped on it. I left Books-A-Million after four months with academic and professional dreams still within my grasp. Second chances don’t come often. This was it.
I graduated from Mobile in 2004 and immediately went off to seminary in New Orleans. At the time I’d put nonprofit dreams on the back burner to be a college minister. We all go through phases- I’d just spent a year and a half working with youth and college students. So I went to seminary to become a college minister. It seemed like the thing to do at the time. Hurricane Katrina changed things pretty fast. Although I ended up studying urban missions and church planting throughout seminary, it was the city of New Orleans after Katrina that educated me about life. Namely, it taught me about the fragility of life. I graduated from New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary in 2008 a different person than when I’d started. A better person. A more thoughtful and well-rounded person. Wouldn’t you know it, I didn’t want to be a paid minister/pastor, either.
Much to the surprise of, I’m sure, at least a few people, the professional ministry just wasn’t on my radar anymore. There are plenty of reasons for that- most of which either don’t matter or are another story altogether. But charity- nonprofit work- doing something to help make a difference in the world- that was back on the radar. And it is. I don’t knock pastors. They do great work, and I’m blessed to have many pastor/missionary friends all over the country (and world). Something in me stirred after Katrina. I wanted to help people, and I didn’t want to do it through what we see as organized/traditional church avenues. Two week mission trips to Mexico or Brazil, building white chapels for the local congregations- that’s nice, but it’s not me. Medical missions. Again, not who I am.
So I started out 2009 looking for a job. I admit I was willing to accept a church staff job, but it had to be the perfect situation (there are no perfect situations). The job market was sparse. In June 2009 I found myself in a familiar situation. I was back in Mobile living in the same room eight years prior. After short stints with Target and the Census, I was making coffee at Books-A-Million again. Two degrees and nine years since I first worked in that cafe, there I was doing it all over again. I admit I was discouraged. I didn’t spend all that time for nothing.
Nine years ago I quit Books-A-Million to chase that dream of getting a degree (or two!) and making a difference in the world. Last Friday I left Books-A-Million again to continue dreamchasing.
I want to invest long term. I want to make a lasting difference. I’ve applied for more nonprofit jobs across the country than I can count over the last year. Few bothered to respond. In every case I’ve been rejected. Maybe it’s the economy, and maybe it’s for a lack of professional experience. Either way, I’ve got plans. Beginning two weeks ago I started looking for full-time volunteer positions in the Mobile area. Once I’ve found a place to pour myself into, I’ll try to find a part-time job around town.
Look, I know for some of you it doesn’t make sense. For most of the folks at Books-A-Million, it’s confusing. My manager keeps repeating, “You’re not a material guy, are you Joe?” Why leave a paying (granted, minimum-wage) gig to volunteer full-time? For me, it’s easy. It’s about experience. I could work a decade in retail and never get the experience necessary to work for a nonprofit, much less start one. I’m sacrificing the short-term money (seriously, not even that much) for long-term benefit. I couldn’t do it without the support of my family.
I encouraged my co-workers to pursue their dreams. To never give up on what they want to do in life. Some will spend years at Books-A-Million because it’s where they want to be, or because it’s there and will have them. Most will move on to something else. What I hope to hear one day is that many left, not to pursue a better paying job at Chili’s, but to chase the dreams they’ve had since they were kids. To become someone better than they are today. To make a difference in the world.
Anyway, I my final shift at Books-A-Million was last Friday. Over the last couple weeks I had several of my regulars tell me how they’ll miss me. I’ve received plenty of undeserved compliments, and I know one thing for sure. If I’ve made a small difference in the lives of the folks I meet at Books-A-Million, then maybe I’ll be able to make a difference at the next stop, too. Hopefully it will be more.
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by Joe Kennedy
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